I have been thinking of this question for sometime now – mainly because I am questioning whether two people are ever really “soul” mates. I think like most women out there when I made the decision to get married, I weighed the pros and cons and balanced out his negatives with his positives and decided that he complements me in more ways than not. I think, like most people out there who get married, I settled for this man because well, for one, he asked me to marry him, and things were better than not with him. I saw having children with him and he was a really good guy. Of course, I loved him too but I never really saw this man as my soul mate.
Which leads me to ask the question, what really is a soul mate? Is it someone who fulfills your dreams? Someone you see eye-to-eye with on everything? Someone who completes your existence? Would life with this person be perfect in every way? I wonder about that from time to time. Hollywood gives us sappy movies like “Serendipity” and we think, Hmmm… is there really such a thing as soul mates? Are they born or made or is it just timing?
I personally do not think there is such a thing as soul mates. I have girlfriends I just get along with better than others. Does that make them my soul mate? After all, no one can complete you except yourself and no one can really have a perfect life. They can just have more fun with someone over another- the same thing applies in a marriage. The person you marry is not necessarily your soul mate but rather, someone you get along with better than you would get along with someone else – someone you can share things with that you would not with others, or someone who just complements you well. I do not think in a marriage things will always be perfect but is it possible to find someone who thinks a little more like you, shares more of your values, or can communicate like you do; that someone who is always “in sync” with you? Sure. But remember that same “sync” may change as time goes on and the partner changes. So, is there a true soul mate for everyone out there? My theory is that there are just people, male and female, that come into our lives at a certain time in our lives when we need them and attract them, and things just … click. So we befriend them, or in the case of timing for marriage, marry them. How you choose to define “soul mate” is up to you. I describe my soul mates as everyday people who are more than ordinary and sometimes, if the timing is right, and your personalities mesh, truly extraordinary.